As I write, my dad is on a plane heading in my direction. And in a couple of hours I will pick Jonathan up from school and after a quick bite of lunch we will head to the airport to meet Papa.
There are too many emotions to even contemplate sorting out right now, especially at 9am in Starbucks where I tend to cry all too often when I write. I’ll save that for next week when I’m more prepared with a bag full of kleenex and have had some time to process. And of course when I’m armed with some photos:)
This is the beginning of a slew of change and visitors. I have been thinking of strategies for Jonathan, and me, to help us cope over the next months and all I’ve come up with is breath and eat chocolate and chips. I’ll keep working on that. If anybody has any suggestions for when people are visiting and how to handle your adopted kid who can’t handle change, disruption, new people or a tired mama on a regular day please lemme know!
If yesterday was an indication of how things will go then yikes! I just may buy stocks in Humptys and Old Dutch….
Our social worker had a visit, and like when all visitors leave he looses his cool and gets discombobulated for several hours after (she was barley out the door and he was on the floor crying because I said something obviously wrong). But it was during the visit too that he was thrown off, something I thought he was getting better at as evident by two awesome visits from my friend this past week that went so so well. Sigh. One forward two back right?
The extent of Jonathan’s neglect and disruption in the first 4 years of his life is becoming more and more evident as we approach 6 months (whoohooo!) of placement.
In many ways as he is really starting to show us what he needs, what is difficult for him, and where he’s coming, which in turn is helping me have more patience and understanding through the bizarre and quirky and constant behaviours. I mean I knew before, but somehow seeing the patterns and consistent struggles, especially juxtaposed against some really great days these last couple of weeks, is somehow evolving and changing our relationship, our grasp, and our love too, for each other.
AND, because there’s not enough topic changes in this post, Jonathan is signing and talking like crazy! He seems to be in a spurt of language explosion, both talking and signing. This morning in the car, which is often the hardest time to understand him because I can’t see him signing, he told me “mommy bunny back there on grass” I nearly pulled over to find the flippin’ bunny I was so excited. Every word clear, a spontaneous sentence, out of context and I understood. Progress people! He also signed at a stop light “few people walking outside” and “sometimes lots people” Who is this kid?! Since when did he know the sign for ‘sometimes’? Is this what happens when he sleeps more than 9 hours?!
And I swear he’s getting cuter too.
Enough rambling. I have coping supplies to stock up on and a cute little sponge to pickup to meet his Papa. Have a wonderful rest of the week!